I am the alpha beta male
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I am a soon to be failed stand up comedian. This is, more or less, exactly the same as every other tumblr that's out there. I'm thinking of it as a online scrapbook-journal thing. Hopefully a year or so from now I can look back at this and think about how much I want to punch past-me in the face.

following:

standpoor e7-deactivated80808080 liamdryden collegehumor ursus---arctos itsvondell wow-realoriginal wheredidthatbearcomefrom zaclittle fekbenn cartoonhangover colchrishadfield johndarnielle neilcicierega fishingboatproceeds notthatwaycowboy bryankonietzko fakescience slomozovo jonahray fuckiminmy20s michaelaranda pornhubcommentsonstockphotos radiomaru streeter tediousbrief adventuretime explodingdog blogwell kylekinane gunshowcomic hodgman beatonna nedroidcomics thesemi-charmedlife dangurewitch scannedlife patrickcassels samreich manimator weatherdotcomwantsmedead hoursongs neil-gaiman fuckyeahscottpilgrimcomic mulaney vondellswain poptech standupcomedyblog azizisbored themildrevolution mynameisboburnham watchthecradle stupidstupidboysmellypastahouse pornhubcommentsonvalentines doodlebops iamdonald windows95tips dcpierson nakedhawkeye nickkocher doyoubelieveinrapture rocketboom michelleocomedy entropyexhibited egofaptor exquisitebeast superheroesdoingweirdshit j-castaneda tumblrbot imaginawesome amateurlovemakingmonthly imaginefucking mustlovevlogs naturesecrets thestorydump bfvgc domfera fycovers thatgirlyoukindofknow repeatingpepper
I don’t care what anyone says, this is the most badass shit I’ve ever heard about

I don’t care what anyone says, this is the most badass shit I’ve ever heard about

 

bgib:

der—riese:

the13thcommander:

tupacabra:

neanerbeaner:

tupacabra:

people who say “melk” instead of milk

image

I say melk…

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you know, melk is actually the dutch word for milk

are you really going to beat up all of holland

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(via standpoor)

 

It takes me such little time to go from not-sweatpants to sweatpants when I get home that its almost cause for concern 

 
27,702 plays
 

liamdryden:

borlax:

In honor of Earth Day I thought I would post a really cool audio file of how Earth sounds from space. Although there is no sound in space, this audio file is actually radio waves that were emitting from our planet and then converted into audio by computers. Pretty incredible stuff. 

wow, it’s actually as powerful and beautiful as you’d expect.

 
thesassycat:

sluttybitch2007:

The rest of the space is going to be pretty pissed when they see this. 

did you google how to take a screen shot

thesassycat:

sluttybitch2007:

The rest of the space is going to be pretty pissed when they see this. 

did you google how to take a screen shot

(via e7-deactivated80808080)

 

Tonights episode of Adventure Time was… heavy

I mean it was good, but, fuck

 

woodmeat:

matter fact dont cum anywhere

when u done fuckin she gonna be like “where did you cum”

"dont worry about it"

hide the nut 2k14 

(via standpoor)